Thursday, February 21, 2008

let it be let it be let it be let it let it be let it be.

n even after all he's done, i still wonder if he really deserves this. whether he reeally is such a bad bf to deserve it. i know the answer, and it's yes. after all tt he's done. and not done. refused to do.

but even as i'm hurt as eff, i feel like fuck that it has to come to this in the end and i might risk hurting him. but then he said it wouldnt make a difference even if we broke up rite? he said life will still go on. yea he said that.

i still have feelings for him. i'm trying to tell myself to move on. i still love him...but the last part of me that hopes he will change fore the better is gone. completely. even last night when i told him tt he has to try harder if he wants the relationship to work, i didn't say it with any expectations. it was simply a warning that there was something wrong in the relationship. i could've chosen not to tell him but i thought it was only fair for him to know. even if he does try harder now, i will wonder how long it's gonna last until he goes back to his old self again.


now i better dry my eyes, pray, then go to sleep. not gonna end up oversleeping n missing my lesson because of him again like today.

i was thinking jz now tt at least God loves me, he'll still take care of me no matter wad. my girlfriends love me too, they care about me. he says he still loves me, but the way things are, it's obvious enough that he doesn't care about me. i thought love n care came hand in hand.

Posted by s t a t i c at 2:17 AM